stay the course

In September, around the time that Kentucky Attorney General Daniel Cameron denied the grand jury the option of holding the officers responsible for the unjust murder of Breonna Taylor accountable, I was overwhelmed with so much anger and cynicism.

I was questioning.

I was wondering if my works and commitments to justice-making mattered.

In that moment, it all seemed futile.

And, I had jumped on the treadmill of feeling like nothing was enough.

I was turning inward, and I was on the precipice of losing sight of the freedom dream that I was co-laboring towards. And, beneath the surface, I was simmering in a slow-burning, all-consuming fire. On day three, or maybe it was day four, of being in this place, a small voice broke into this inferno that was fueling my anger and cynicism.

This small voice whispered into my spirit:

“Stay the course. Don’t become distracted. That thing that you’re pursuing. That freedom dream that’s emerging. All the steps to get there are necessary and still matter. Don’t get distracted. Keep going. When this storm passes because it will, that freedom dream, that vision, and that thing you’re imagining will be needed.

Don’t stop.” And then I remembered Psalm 3 “They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do.”

On this Election Day and in this long and laborious season of heightened and blatant injustice, chaos, tension, anxiety, anger, frustration, confusion, and deep sorrow, I offer to you the words and the psalm that broke through my anger and cynicism. If you find no solace or power in this offering for yourself, know that you are not alone in what you are feeling or experiencing.

In this season, for however long it may last, give yourself permission to receive what you need to be and feel grounded, rooted, whole and safe right where you are planted.

I share with you this meditation from Lama Rod Owens. It has created space for me to be and feel grounded, rooted, whole, and safe.

(first published on Facebook on Nov. 3, 2020)